Priceless

No I know this post is not priceless. And I was not at all intent on posting any thing. You see I am absolutely certain that only people who have visited my pages are those whom I was able to pursue to torture themselves on account of any love they have for me. But to my surprise a few days ago one of my cousins complained that I had not posted any new posts. And she observed that my monthly blog count has gone 3-2-1.

So with my new found inspiration I was looking for something to write about and what do I come across.

Priceless.. (a french movie)

Well the movie is true to its name. Nothing better than a movie that can give you a mood lift when you need it. I had returned from home the day before and was still under the away from home blues. But this movie made me come out of it in a jiffy.

Totally unpretentious and with a cast that totally suits the plot. The only face in the film that I was familiar with was the actress Audrey Toutou (DaVinci Code). Still all characters are charming or loathesome at the whim of the script. And of course the setting of the movie, glorious hotels and locales of Nice, add to the overall mood of the film.

Now I do not have the literary abilities or the technical know how of a movie critic. So will not ramble on any further. But I can tell you this. If you can overcome your initial inhibitions of watching a movie with subtitles, you are in for a treat. In my opinion subtitles are much better than dubbing.

Do let me know of your opinion of the movie if you watch it at my advise or otherwise.

Au Revoir

Peice of the pie

That is a nice pie. And I want a piece of it. And do you know what gives me the right to that pie? I have a stick in my hand. And I will break your leg if you dont give it to me. I will make you choke. The other people in this room who are not even remotely interested in this pie, I will make their life hell too. You know why? I think this pie tastes good and I want a slice of it.

It is not what you are guessing. I am a little loose in the head but I havent lost it completely (not yet at least). But the Gujjars seem to have lost whatever little they had (no offence to those who believe in peaceful co-existence and are not a part of the madness).

Today morning I switched on the television while I sat down to finish my breakfast and what do I see? Groups of young men, sturdy able men, men with many years full of possibility ahead of them, thronging streets, wielding sticks, hockeys, burning tyres, blocking roads, and waving frantically at the tv cameras like new found celebrities (just so you know why they are on the streets in the first place. I hate reality tv.. :)P). Shame was the first emotion I felt. I wondered how many of them would be ready to claim individual responsiblity for their acts of hysteria. Would they show the same courage if they were not a part of a mob? What gives them this right to so paralyse the functioning of the society?

How I wish they showed similar enthusiasm when it comes to facing challenges that life throws at them (oh yes I havent forgotten that I am the privileged one and have nothing else to do but to blabber about things that I dont understand). And I shudder when I imagine the fate of a nation whose youth don't believe in the virtue of hard work and take to begging by force as their claim to prosperity. It belies the illusion of a progressive India, an India which would lay its claim as one of the major player on the global arena. What is beyond my understanding is how can reservation be a one stop solution to all problems. But clearly solutions are on no one's mind. This is just an issue to spend all the hoarded energy on, a vent for all frustations, disappointments and shared misery (this reminds me of what Sunil Dutt says to the thief in Munna Bhai MBBS).

I guess Arjun Singh would be the happiest man on earth today. May be he should migrate to Rajasthan where he will find his most avid followers.

What I dread the most is the government giving into their demands. That would be one of the biggest failure of our country as a democracy (how many such failures could be counted I wonder).

I am lost now I guess. There is no way this rant is going to benefit anyone so I stop here with a solemn prayer that may some sanity prevail. Were bomb blasts not enough reason for distress that people are subjected to inconveniences such as this.. all driven by whims of a handful of people.

Run Fatboy Run..

Recently one of my friends posted a scrap on orkut summarising the tale of his life..

ask what does a commando do for a living "push ups"

and what is his routine? "run" stop and run"

ha ha ha ha ha (that is him laughing on himself)

I thought I should share a story too. Sure I am no commando. But yes I have this new found fad for running long distances. I do around 5 kms a day non stop (which might be a little stretched figure, but that is the good thing about bragging), 3-4 days a week. And it is not for getting into shape. It just brings some old memories back and restores my faith in myself.

Following is an account of how I spent my morning today.

Before I begin running(on my way to the start from my home) the only thoughts that occupy me are "how much will I be able to cover today, when will my legs give in". As I enter the museum garden, all other thoughts cease and I take a moment to appreciate all the colous that spring has brought with itself. The best green you can find is sprawled in fornt, dotted with, red, pink, white, purple, blue, magenta, colours from fairy tales. A moment lasts for ever. And then it begins. The sloping road helps to overcome any residual reluctance. I follow the winding track, flanked on both sides by bushes and trees and I am out of the garden and by the riverside.

The air felt cold when I left the house. I have a woolen cap on (fake nike), a sweat shirt (genuine Fila), Reebok lowers (authentic again), gloves (not branded :() and my crap shoes that hurt my feet. It seems I misread the weather. The sun is out now and it is going to get warmer. The muscles of my legs are still stiff from the last day's ?? and the pain in my bones hasn't left me yet. Around 150 m of running and I feel loose again. It is time to increase my strides. I pass a little girl, carrying her doll in a pram, being chased by her mother. The image stays with me for a while and I smile.

Now I am by the cricket field (we use it as one any way, even if it is not meant to be for that purpose). The air smells fresh and I take a few deep breaths. I would soon be needing a lot more of them. I pass a few people, some running, some taking thier dogs for a walk. Some smile, some say HI. It props up my spirits. It amazes me how people here don't find it awkward to acknowledge and greet complete strangers.

At the river landing people are preparing to go canoeing. Two canoes are already in the river, rowing. I remember the day I tried to race one canoe and failed miserably. These guys are good. It is warm. I take off my cap and gloves.

Breathing from the nose is no longer enough. I need more air. My heart is thumping in my chest. But breathing from my mouth has its downside. It dries up very quickly. Makes running harder. I try hard to keep my mind from thinking about it.

The river takes a left turn here. I go over the flood gates and into the open field. This acts as the encatchment at times when the river floods. It is an immensely vast strech of land covered only by grass. Into the horizon you can see a couple of factories. I family has come out to enjoy the nice morning air. A couple of cyclists pass by.

The thought of turning back crosses my mind but I decide against it. There is just another 500m to go to reach my target point. The heat is becoming unbearable. I take off my sweat shirt and tie it around my waist. I reach the back of my office and it is time to turn back. Half of the feat is done. The tougher part remains. I start back without a break. Any stop now would make running again only harder.

The pain in my legs is now on the rise. And a debate is already on in my head about giving up or carrying on. And believe me when you are running alone it can prove to be very loud. I wish I had a music player with me. 90% of my body is forcing me to stop. My legs are hurting very bad and pleading for rest, my lungs refuse take in any more oxygen, my heart feels as if it would burst out of my chest any moment. It is just my mind that urges me to go on. Giving up is too easy. The humiliation of submission would be too overwhelming to bear. I cross the floodgates.

After a while I have to make up stories to keep going. I imagine being chased by a dog at first. It keeps me going for a while. But soon being bitten by the dog feels better than continuing running. So I imagine being chased by a Godzilla. It works for a while but then logic takes over. Even if I were being chased by the Godzilla, I would seek refuge in a nearby bush or jump into the river (even though I dont know how to swim and godzilla is supposed to be a great swimmer, it crossed over from russia to US in the movies. But you cant believe everything they show in the movies), and not continue running to a predetermined check point.

This brings to my attention the fact that I am already by the riverside and about to arrive at the cricket field. The wind here is strong and pushes me back. I see a person give up running in front of me. I dont want to end it like him but I have got to stop at the end of the field. I cant carry on any longer.

At this point it is my tiredness that keeps me going and not my strength. Each step is an effort to prevent myself from falling.

As I arrive at the end of the field and turn the bend I can see the Lendal bridge. The garden is hardly 300m from here. I cant give up now. It will make all the distance I have covered an exercise in futility. I increase my strides. My hearbeat seems to fail me, my breath falling short of supplying requisite amount of oxygen, I wish I could get some water but my legs carry me.

All the while I keep getting close to the museum garden gate, my goal. 10 steps left now.. 5 more.. 3.. 2.. 1.. VICTORY!!! Oh so sweet the satisfaction. The curses from my legs do not make a difference now. As I enter the museum garden for the second time in the day, it seems to have undergone a major change. The colours have become more vibrant, the sights more beautiful.

It is hard to walk with the legs paining. I lie under a tree and stretch my legs. I have a weekend ahead to plan for. And then I have to be back again here tomorrow. The thought is not a pleasant one but I leave it for tomorrow.

For now I am in heaven.

Just a thought..

The conversation had been going on for sometime now.

Then the moment came for what should have been said. It was the perfect moment, when even the simple words become profound in meaning, convey a lot more than is said, find their interpretation from what has already been said as if the whole point of the conversation was to set up a stage for it.

But he said something entirely different. That was because what should have been said had not come to him at that time. It came to him an instant later, when the moment was past.

But he couldnt say it now. Because it had lost its context and thus its relevance. Saying it then would have been demeaning to it, an irreverence, a sacrilege.

He regretted his slip up. Rued it until much later. The guilt hounded him for the rest of the conversation and even afterwards.

So it remained thus. Just a thought, lost to the ears, never to be uttered again.

Dark night, a silent lake and falling snow

He had lost count of days he had been walking.

His legs were weary and ready to give in under him any moment. The rugged terrain wasn't helping him much either. He had lost his bearings and had no idea where he was at the moment. The only thing he was aware of was that he could not stop. That would mean a certain death.

By the altitude of the scorching sun he could tell it was around noon. Had it not been for his goggles he might have gone blind by the glare of the sunshine and its reflection from the earth. He was drenched in sweat by now. But he could not take off his bio-suit. The air had turned into poisonous fumes and the temperature too high for exposed skin to bear without getting burnt.

He had negotiated the slope and was now at the top of the stone hill. He looked to the horizon and his eyes strained to catch a glimpse of what he was looking for. All he could see was vast expanse of parched land. This part of land was as barren as he had come across the entire length of his journey. Only a few stumps, that would once have been greeen and laden with fruit but dead now, stood here and there breaking the continuity of the landscape.

Suddenly he was aware of a movement behind him. He turned around to catch a glimpse of a figure moving behind the stones not 10 meters from him. It was the first time he had seen it though he had had this feeling of being followed for three days now. He had guessed that it was an animal following him, waiting for him to give up and die. He became aware of the gun hidden under the belt of his suit and his hands inched towards it. He was running low on ammo. In his head he went through the list of things he needed to pick up when he came upon the next town. He might have to kill the animal for sake of food. But eating a living of the wild had its own dangers. It was difficult to guess what all the animal had been feeding on and how poisoned it had become.

This was the first time in several days that he had seen a living creature. The last men he had seen was about two weeks back and he felt lucky he didnt see them too often. He had been way laid on his last encounter but the guys didnt suspect a gun on him and met their fate. He didnt blame them. Things had been like this for a long time now. The only way you could get supplies was if you came across an empty and disowned store or to rob someone who had them.

How did it come to all this?

There had been talk of things becoming like this for a long time. Scientists warned but the politicians and industrialists had taken no heed. Some tried to change the course of the events but their efforts were never enough to make a sizeable difference. A common man had no clue what he could have done. His pressing worries for making a living were too great for him to handle. Who had time to think of the environment? It was last on the priority lists.

The changes had started a long time before things became so bad. Temperatures had started rising where he had lived. In distant lands, he had heard, the temperatures reached lows never seen before. In other parts the oceans swelled and had started claiming lands and people. Food and water had become scarce. What ever was left had been polluted to an extent that it had been deemed hazardous for human consumption. People migrated in hoardes to look for what could not be found around them. There was news of people taking to violence and widespread riots. Whatever could not be got had to be snatched. The administration in most of the places had crumbled under the enourmous pressure and lawlessness became rampant and order of the day. Communities had their own armies to protect whatever was their own by means of produce or loot. The times were labelled return to the age of cannibalism in the text books.

But the cities were still safe by then. Science had made sure of that. Who ever had the means could enjoy lives of unimaginable luxories. The climate was artificially controlled and air was filtered before being circulated. Artificial water and food had meant that there was no shortage of supply. The cities had been walled to keep the undeserving out. No one had to worry about a thing.

But there was a panic setting in here too. World's coal and oil reserves were on the verge of running out. There had been talks of sustainable renewable enery about to reveal itself and discovery of artifical fuels. But soon it became evident that there was a gap between their arriving and the current energy sources running out. Within months the crisis that was considered to be in the distant future arrived. The oil wells failed to spew any more oil, the coal mine productions fell to nil. Millions of vehicles got stopped in theirs tracks. The metallic monsters that were once objects of pride and envy were redued to pieces of junk. Cities that were once well contained and supplied had to be abandoned. The insiders were exposed to the wrath of the outsiders. Few survived. He was one of the lucky few. This change had come as a violent shock initially to him. But he had come to terms with his situation and was determined to live through it.

His chain of thoughts was broken by the shimmering reflection in a distance. Finally he had come across water and he was badly in need of it. He hurried towards it. Though his feet hurt the excitement of his discovery kept him sprighlty. With much effort he reached the shore of what was a small lake.

The water was slimy, black in colour and bubbling in places. It was no surprise that there was no vegetation around. He saw the creature come out of its hiding and go around the lake, maintaining its distance from him. It could have been a wolf or a hyena, he couldnt tell. Its skin was full of blisters. It came to the shore, hesitated a little then stooped to drink whatever was available. He took out his water container. There was very little water left. He drank it in one gulp and scooped to fill his container. He reached for his bag. He had only three more pills of Anidez left. He took out one and emptied the contents in to his container. That was as potable as he could make the water.

As he drained a second gulp down his throat an old memory was rendered in all its vividness before his eyes. Memory of a distant land he had visited once. It was late night. He was walking alone, along a promenade, beside a lake. The whole of the city shimmered in the lake creating gaps in the dark water. Boats lay abandoned swinging to the lullaby of the waves lapping at the shores. Some swans suddenly flew breaking the ever deepening silence. The promenade was flanked on both sides by leafless trees their branches arching over the concrete road. The road was lit by a series of lamps hanging on single electric cable suspended over the middle of the road. It was snowing lightly. The silvery snowflakes appeared suddenly out of darkness, glowed momentarily in the light of the street lamps before vanishing into the ground. When he looked up some of the snow settled on his face, its chill sending shivers down his body. The trees were covered by snow giving them appearance of divine angels welcoming him with their arms open. To his left lay sprawling, minutely manicured lawns, their green hidden under a white blanket of snow. Beyond the lawns were the gothic buildings the city was so proud of. He, for a moment, admired the magnificent facades adorned by beautiful sculptures and giant arches and marvelled at what mankind had made possible by its imagination and labour. A rat, finding its way through the snow, caught his attention. He chased it until the rat took to a ramp into a boat. Poor owner he thought. He suddenly grew aware of his lonliness. There was no one but him as far as he could see. He wished he had some loved one beside him to tell the feelings he was experiencing, to share the beauty around him.

The sudden pang of lonliness returned to him and brought him back to the harsh reality that lay in front of him. The creature had finished drinking. It was lying flat on the ground and staring at him with intent maliciousness.

He was glad he was still breathing. He had hope that as long as he was alive a better future was possible. He put his container back in the bag and took out his gun. He moved slyly towards the creature, seeing it eye to eye, returning its glare.

The mayhem continues

Since I posted my last blog I have been eager to return to write something. But again I keep wondering about what to write. I guess I will never get rid of this conundrum.

A number of movies I have seen recently have eerily the same theme. Taare Zameen Par, Edward Scissorhands and Sling Blade to name a few. All these movies feature an abnormal character who has lived in isolation for most of his time and is suddenly placed in the company of normal people. These movies capture the resulting social reactions of fascination, insecurity, hatred and guilt and the character's own dilemma of being prosecuted for no crime of his.

How different is the portrayal of the society in these movies different from ours in real world?

Why is it so hard for us to accept someone different from ourselves?

Is it not because we see our own inadequacies in meeting the standards our society sets for us and our fear of being exposed? In other's weakness lies our strength. So let it be at someone else's expense that we hide our own scars and show other's in glaring light.

Or is it because we hate our follies so much that it becomes intolerable for us to see them in others?

Am I confused and all mixed up in the head?

On a lighter note, last weekend I was returning from my trip to London. My train was supposed to reach York at about 12:45 a.m. I had finised reading The Great Gatsby and had nothing else to do. I was afraid that I might fall asleep and miss my station. There was no one in my co-passenger seat I could have engaged in conversation (well it wouldnt have mattered as I find it hard to initiate conversations). Luckily not too far from me there was a group of girls sitting and chatting. For a distraction I eves-dropped on their conversation (doesnt sound good eh..). Only a part of what they said reached me (believe me I never intended to hear what they were saying and anyway that is not the point). There was this one girl who did most of the talking. She talked about nearly everything, her parents, her shopping sprees, how she could never save and her brother had saved 400 pounds with the same amount of pocket money, how nice a place York is and how much it is different from London.. blah blah blah... Well the point is since I started to listen till I reached York (a total lenght of about 1 hour 45 minutes) she talked incessently. I cant do that even if I try. And then I thought why? I guessed you have to be completely in love your life. Have a jest for it. Enjoy every moment so much that every little bit of it seems worthy of sharing with utter disregard of what the person listening is thinking and whether (s)he finds it interesting.

But now I realise I was reading too much into it. It is just a super human power that women possess. You just cant beat them at it.

But whatever the case, that conversation saw me home.

On a parting note.. I saw The Bank Job recently. It was after a long time that I had seen such a thorougly entertaining movie. I will say just this. Not a boring moment in this job. Tag your friends along.

Here I Am

I opened this account around an year ago, inspired by some prolific bloggers I had come across. At that time I had imagined I would have a lot to say. Things that would be of some significance. Things that are answers to questions that baffle us all. But even at this point of time I am wondering what to write about.

Writing about myself is not an appropriate idea as it would bore the person reading it to death and it would kill me even before I start to write.

My work.. well I dont hate it but it is not the most interesting thing one could do. And there are so many of my kind that there is no novelty left in cracking jokes about it either. Anyhow what greater joke could you play on a person who has been condemned to read pieces of codes (not of Da Vinci fame) written by fools like him ages ago and break his head for the mistakes they made.

Current Affairs :O... (((( shudders )))). :) Whenever I thought something of importance had happened that would affect the generations to come and leave its indelible mark on the epoch we are part of, so much had already been said that writing more about that would have been repeating someone else's words. And again neither I am a genius nor do I have such command over english language as to mask my ignorance and make it look like perennial wisdom.

There are a few other things on my mind. But let me not bore you any more and move on to the next point of importance - "what can I write about".

Well I can tell you about movies as I watch them a lot. And probably next time you would find a few reviews (what am I expecting).
I can tell you about books (this statement creates a lot of self-disbelief).. well at least the ones I have read and the ones I would read.
Music?? Though I like music.. I am not sure if I am the person to comment on that. I will drop names of obscure songs that I think people should hear.
I can tell you about India as I see it through my eyes. If would not be very factual and most of it would be emotional. But I should be able to make it interesting (do I need to try, I wonder, when I speak of India).
And I can promote effort of other people by redirecting you to interesting things I come across the internet.

And last but not the least why am I writing now?? Had nothing better to do. My head is still light with the excitement of Indian victory over Australia so I am not thinking clearly. This team showed great character to seal the series. I wish they dont let the success get to their heads and remain focussed on the game. Though they totally deserve the gooddies that come with hard work.

Another good piece of news was from Indian hockey. India thrash Mexico 18-1, the headlines read. The real task lies ahead though. India need to beat Britain to qualify for the Olympics. The poor team is paying for the mistakes of their predecessors and the officialdom that is associated with sports in India. But the lads have done good in the recent past.

Dear Federer.. what happened to you. May you come to your "defeat all former self" soon.

Cant believe I have written so much. God bless the random wanderers who chance to pass this page (poor creatues). I admire your tolerance to torture of most brutal nature. Hope I have it in me to keep you coming back.